Gracie's First Lollipop

Gracie's first lollipop
Originally uploaded by AmericaninCanada.

Whew...another year of zany candy and costume madness come and gone.
We're pouring ourselves into bed now after a long afternoon.
The costumes were quite a hit in Tim and Les' neighborhood (even more than last year). There were hoots of 'Yabba Dabba Do' and 'It's the Flintstones' hurled our way all up and down the street.
Gracie really got into the thing after the first few houses because everyone was cooing over her and let's face it...she's already a diva, so she ate it up.
She giggled and smiled and waved at people and even managed to walk on the sidewalk by herself for a bit until they became too crowded- then she started clinging.
She started to realize people were giving her things in her little pumpkin basket and she was VERY happy with that...like her mommy she loves getting gifts.
We cut things a bit short because it was really cold and windy out there, so we went back and gave out candy for a while, then came home.
As you can see in the picture, Gracie had her first ever lollipop (she couldn't resist bogarting my cherry tootsie pop). We don't give her candy or sugar so I wasn't sure how she'd respond. Luckily she did NOT pull a Rod and Todd and start vibrating and speaking in tongues...but then again it was only a lollipop...lollipops are the gateway candy...soon she'll be on a street corner jonesin' for pixie stix and sour patch kids...that's when I'll be a broken man, home crying for the lost soul of my precious daughter.

But think of the lawsuit I'll launch at the sugar industry!!!

Pebbles with Friends

Pebbles with Friends
Originally uploaded by AmericaninCanada.

There are a couple of shots of our Halloween costumes (in the early stages) on my Flickr.

(apologies to Beckie...we too had the Flinstone theme mapped out when you posted pics of Emma...so we're not stealing from you...call it an homage!)

We almost changed at the last minute and Gracie was going to go in a monkey outfit and I was going to be the Empire State Building...but we had already started the sewing...maybe next year?

Toys In The Attic

I think I've worked most of the kinks out and the new 'toys' looks pretty good. If you haven't stopped by yet or adjusted your links you can by visiting The all new Toys in the Attic Since blogger has become so evil, I don't think I'll update this one too much more...so that's where you'll find me from now on... and now I grow fatigued.

The Creation of the Meta-Blog

So I've been tinkering with WordPress and I've decided to create a sort of UberBlog, which will be housed at http://photoblog.stamant.org/toysintheattic/ You can change your links accordingly if you so desire. I'll still be posting things here via Blogger's interface, but I'll be using the MetaBlog for a sort of collected volume of my other blog posts as well. The WordPress interface just offers me a tad more freedom, and I really fell in love with the layout. So yes, Nicole, I have another blog...hey I wasn't the Most Prolific Writer two years running at Bayside High School and managing editor of Shore Lines newspaper for nothing...words, man..words...

Can't Sleep, Clowns Will Eat Me

I'm deep in the throes of insomnia again :( My brain is full and I can't relax. Everyone else in the house is sound asleep, so I came into my office to look at pictures because that always helps to soothe this beast. This is one of my favorite photos that I always love to look at ...it reminds me of the relative calm of this time last year, when Ginny Grace was just this sleepy little ball that just needed feeding and changing. She didn't need to climb into my lap every five minutes or have me read "Where's Maisy" 30 times in a row. She didn't leave Cheerios lying in the run for me to crush with my Fred Flintstone feet. She didn't stick handfuls of dog-hair into her mouth to remind me that I need to vacuum. Of course, as much as those things wear me out, I know I wouldn't trade them for anything. This is a man's world But it wouldn't be nothing without a woman or a girl There's a really cool celebration about to happen in St.Louis. Some of the gang from Flickr/Blogger are hooking up to welcome home Patrick from his tour of duty in Afghanistan. In a short time this little group of people have become quite special to me. They share their stories and their pictures and have been terribly sweet. When Ange got the idea to send pictures of people toasting Patrick, who couldn't get his beloved Guinness in Afghanistan, it was just a wonderful spark that turned into this massive bonfire of support for a soldier. I took some of those photos and made a little tribute movie... It went over well with the crowd! I'm bummed that I can't be with them to raise a glass in real life to Patrick..to meet these news friends..to share the joy of a safe return to the warm embrace of friends and family. I know that they know that I wish them well, but I'll say it again for the record. Thanks Patrick for your service and sacrifice, and thank you Ange for bringing us all along. The Irish say: Always remember to forget The troubles that passed away. But never forget to remember The blessings that come each day. 'Sláinte chuig na fir, agus go mairfidh na mná go deo.' Health to the men, and may the women live forever! Cheers

Andrew Sullivan | The Daily Dish: Madison's Conservatism of Doubt

Andrew Sullivan | The Daily Dish: Madison's Conservatism of Doubt Ooo...I made the big time (or Time) as it were. I'm the 'reader' in question and Andrew graciously reprinted my remarks. If I'm accepted into a PhD program at McMaster, I'll be focusing on the history of the American Constitution as my primary field [some other program at another University might change that]. As such I'm a deep Madisonian. In American political history it is common to divide the 18th and 19th century political movement between Hamiltonians and Jeffersonians- and there is a great amount of truth in that dichotomy- they were the standard bearers for the Federalist and Republican 'parties' in the early 19th century (I use quotations because neither would have openly embraced the idea they led, or were inspirations for 'party' politics, yet they were). While the influence of Hamilton and Jefferson survived for generations beyond their own, it is Madison, in my opinion, whose influence is still with us. Perhaps this is so because he was, if not the conduit for both men and their ideas, then at least the first true pragmatist in the post-Revolution era. He combined the hope (and fears) of Jefferson and the Republicans, with the strong centralization behind Hamiliton's political leanings. It was Madison who defined the Constitution as an effort to "form a more perfect union" which in itself is the evidence of his conservatism of doubt, infused with the politics of hope. He realized that humans were imperfect creatures thus in need of government, but a government that "We the People" designed. There is hardly a political fight today that could not use some insight from a close reading of The Federalist Papers. The genius of Madison is that he understood the passions of ideology, and the dangers of absolutism- no more proof is needed than his firm challenge to his father-figure, Jefferson, over Jefferson's support of the French Revolution. In short, Madison could see radicalism before others could.

While My Guitar Gently Sleeps

I decided to take some black and whites of my guitar tonight...yes I am bored and it's been raining for what seems like weeks so nothing oustide to snap except standing water. I couldn't believe how dusty it was. Of course it would be less dusty if I picked it up every once in awhile. I don't play. I started to learn to play about 15 years ago. I bought a nice Washburn from a percussionist I knew and played harp with. It was tougher that I thought. I didn't quite play till my fingers bled as Bryan Adams recommended, but I came close. I was dating/living with my first real girlfriend- or what passed for a relationship. The strings weren't sharp (and frankly neither was my girlfriend). She thought it would be a nice present to have my guitar restrung with more professional strings, and so without telling me, she took it from the house and it "was stolen out of her car". I put that in quotations because, looking back on it, I'm not unconvinced she didn't hock the thing- but alas I have no proof- just misgivings as it were...about a lot of things. My hands aren't built for the guitar. I have stubby fingers on the ends of my meaty paws. My hands are built more for pic-i-nick baskets and mauling Rangers with BooBoo...but I'm smarter than the average bear (I think) and I was learning to maneuver my digits over the frets pretty well before "the stealing" took place. With my heart broken, in more ways than one, I never picked up another guitar. My dreams of rock stardom eroding with my hairline. I had long hair back then. Hell, I HAD haird back then. I lost a guitar, a girl, and hair...I'm starting to sound like a country song. Anyway flash forward to a few years ago and I've got a new girl but even less hair- and no guitar. She buys me this one for our first Christmas as a married couple because she'd heard the story, saw the tears, bought the t-shirt... She was so excited to give it to me and it was sort of sad when she learned that she had accidentally given me the Christmas list to use to get presents for our families, not realizing that she had 'Ron-Guitar' written on it...she cried. I pick it up every once in a while, but it's always out of tune when I feel like picking at it, and by the time I've gone upstairs, pulled up the chord finder and tuned the thing...well the moment has passed. I keep thinking I'll take a class, or buy a book and learn the play...and maybe I will. I hope it doesn't fall into the 'someday' classification like 'someday I'll lose weight' or 'someday I'll take over the world' or God forbid 'someday the Cubs will win the World Series' Still it's a very pretty guitar. And it's black like Johnny Cash's so if'n I ever shoot a man in Reno just to watch him die I'll have a head start. For now I'll just hang my head and cry.

Wide Awake

It's 3am and I'm completely sleepless. We have guests coming tomorrow for dinner so we spent most of the afternoon and evening getting the house in order, eating leftover Chinese food, and watching the Leafs lose in a shoot-out- with a side trip to get new shoes and a carseat (finally) for the van. Ginny Grace was absolutely a whirl-wind of crazy...when we loaded her into the van (her first time since we got it a couple of weeks ago) she got this look of terror as if she thought we were giving her away to strangers- then it clicked and she was fascinated by the lights. Then at the shoe store she walked up and down the aisles, randomly jabbering to the bemused customers- she's still in the 'cute, not annoying phase' I suppose instead of the 'bothersome, someone get this kid away from me' phase... As we were at the front paying for the shoes, I was holding her and all the ladies in the store were doing that 'oo and ah' thing and she was eating it up. "Isn't she cute" one lady said. "Don't you want to stay" said another. Someone made a joke and started to laugh and Ginny Grace cackled too which set the whole store a-twittering. When we got home, Shell was making pumpkin scones, making the house smell great- even though I hate the taste of pumpkin I love the smell...anyway, I was on the couch watching the Leafs and Gracie decided it was time to read "Where's Maisy?" her current favorite book. She requires it be read at least 8 times with full sound effects on the "oops, not here" parts. If we're lucky she just wants to read the book, if we're NOT lucky she wants to stop and kiss every animal on the pages. She kisses lots of stuff...okay everything- the dogs, her toys, her books, the baby in the mirror, her koala bear slippers from Auntie Lauren in Australia... She's such a flirt. On the birthday front... Apparently Shell has decided she's taking me somewhere. It's somewhere I want to go- so she says- and I have to dress semi-nice. I've grown way too comfortable in my non-working, stay-at-home time (which I swear is coming to an end within the next 2 weeks hopefully). The most 'dressed up' I get these days is when I go to class and that consists of my jeans with the holes in the back pocket and my Falcons jersey- clearly I'm in need of a makeover...Most of the time I'm in my comfy running shorts and t-shirt so I don't know WHAT I'm gonna do now. There's a long rambling political essay in my head that I'll be soon putting to keyboard, maybe tomorrow night after our guests are gone. I just want to say a special thanks to Ange, Kim, and Sarah for their new friendship...it's been a real help to read about their parenting experiences, and occasionally get some feedback. Sometimes as a new parent you start to get the feeling that your in this lonely battle, handling this little new creature that you can't always figure out. It is wondrous to know that, indeed, you are NOT alone and share experiences and lessons make much easier- so thanks ladies.

Answers to first batch of Birthday Suggestions

I'm not certain, and I'm not usual a conspiracy theorist...but it strikes me as odd that both Sarah AND Kim have suggested birthday events that require me to be high in the sky. Are they under the belief that they are in the will?? See the thing with hot-air ballooning is that is sounds vaguely romantic, but I promise you there'd be little romance in me huddled on the floor of the basket, curled up under my knees praying to the baby Jesus. Same with sky-diving...sounds really cool IN THEORY...in practice it would be a few minutes of screaming followed by lots of crying like a 7 year old who lost his favorite Chewbacca action figure and is pretty damn sure his 4 year old brother took it and traded it for gum. Well that's assuming the shoot opened, otherwise there'd be more minutes of screaming ended by a presumably sickening thud. So any event must EXCLUDE an IMPLICIT risk of death- this serves as Rule #1 I'll have more rules in the coming days as I think of them.

Ain't It The Life

First a funny picture of my pumpkin belly... Today has been just an incredibly long day. I had a cardiologist appointment this morning at 9am in the city, which meant having to get Ginny Grace up at 6:30 (and thankfully my wife who is more used to waking before the sun took care of getting her all set to go while I lumbered around like a hungover frat boy). It was bloody awful outside, rain cascading down and slowing the normal crawl of 401 morning traffic into complete inertia. It took over 2 hours to get in and park, then hustle the baby out of the horrible weather and up to the office. So it was no wonder to me when I blew a 160 over 95 on my blood pressure- very bad. However, after an ECG and an ultrasound on my chest, I was given better news. Everything looks okay and the 'blip' on my ECG of a year ago plus was probably just an abnormality. I also saw more of my chest cavity than I frankly ever care to see, also the nice lab tech did sort of have to spoon me while she did the ultrasound. Good thing my wife wasn't in there! Actually I could have fallen asleep I was that comfortable on the table (okay I wasn't comfy, I was just dead tired!) Anyway, we took Shell to her studio then headed all the way back home since there just wasn't anywhere to 'hang out' for 7 hours until my class. At 3:30 it was back on the road and back to the city. I had a great class and a fairly decent time driving home...but we're all just sleepy now so I'm going to bed soon. I realize this post has been a) completely humorless, and b) pretty pathetic, so I apologize. I just can't seem to find the funny tonight after dragging my hind parts across the greater Southern Ontario highways. I'll get back to the usual hijinx and pathos soon. Also I'm in a CD burnin' mood, so if I have your address you might get a gifty in the mail in the near future, and if I don't have your address and you want a gifty in the mail soon, drop me a line- no promises on whether you'll like the mix I put together, but then again its free so stop complainin' already!!!! *shakes fist* A little over 2 weeks till my birthday and Shell has asked me 4 times already what I want and I haven't a clue. She asks every year "do you want 'a thing' or do you want 'an event'"? Can't 'a thing' be included in 'an event'? Apparently not. So I turn to you faithful readers...what the heck do I want for my birthday??

1 Post, 2 Essays, and a Multitude of Boredom

I've finished my two short papers, and now I've got a few months to work on the major ones for the semester. I don't think either of these is stunning works, but then again they are great percentages of my grade either, not that I didn't try, just that if you choose to read them, and I invite you to do so, don't worry about being carried away on fluffy clouds of prose that will instantly imbue you with all knowledge. I'll tease you with the intro and then link to the rest so you can investigate at your leisure.
New South Wales: The Undiscovered Country? Sailing the eastern coast of what they would name New South Wales, the men of the Endeavour used their spyglasses to scan the shore. The captain of the vessel, James Cook, had been charged with exploring and settling the land via a set of secret instructions that tasked him with taking possession of the land “with the Consent of the Natives” unless he found “the Country uninhabited”[1]. But what exactly did “uninhabited” mean to Cook and his fellow members of the First Fleet? Did the mere presence of a people on the land render it inhabited, or was New South Wales a “terra nullius”- a land belonging to no one? To answer these questions requires an understanding of what those terms meant to the men of Endeavour, indeed the European powers as a whole, and the difference between civilized and uncivilized worlds. The western world, of which Great Britain was a central power in the late eighteenth century, viewed its traditions and cultures as true civilization. This civilization was based on a rule of law. Codified statutes that recognized, among other things, property as a key pillar of society. Property was something that was owned, not merely in legal terms, but in physical terms as well. Cultivating land was a means of subjugating nature. To prove one’s mastery over the soil was proof of the superiority of man. Furthermore, mastery of the land and its cultivation led to trade and economic prosperity, which further led to improving “the self”; thus perpetuating the progress of civilization. This is how Captain Cook and men such as Watkins Tench defined “civilization”. read more...

The Russian Road: Occident or Orient, and Critiques of the Aristocracy Russia in the eighteenth century existed in an ideological bubble. Its past was written and re-written to conform to the needs of the autocracy. As the autocracy strained to retain its grip on the people, an idealized Russian history clashed with the reality of daily existence. Peter Chaadaev and Vissarion Belinskii were members of the intelligentsia and critics of the autocracy. They sought to open the eyes of their fellow Russians to the reality of eighteenth century Russian life. They saw a corrupt State that had twisted the past, and killed the legacy of reform, using nationalism to quell the peasantry.
The turn of the eighteenth century brought sweeping change to Russia under the rule of Peter the Great. Pre-Petrine Russia was a violent era filled with a harsh autocracy that Peter hoped to eradicate. Inspired by Western Europe countries, Peter founded the city of St. Petersburg as a window to the West in the hope that Europe’s influence and intellectual power would transform Russia into an even greater world power. Yet the reforms he desired amounted to little meaningful change. The autocracy continued, indeed grew more powerful during and after Peter’s reign. read more... So there ya go...tomorrow I can get back to taking photos, and writing something silly

Who's Gonna Save Me??

Ahhh....thanks to my beautiful bride I am now possessed with Season One of Smallville (and that is the right turn of phrase...I am totally possessed...I come late to the party but baybee when I arrive I'm full speed)
Once Ginny Grace was asleep I slid off to my basement fortress of solitude and made myself comfortable and watched all of disc 1...
I have only come up for air, to change my socks, a wee bit of choco milk, and this...
In fact if it wasn't for the Falcons game tomorrow and the fact that I'd be divorced if I didn't actually show myself to the rest of the family tomorrow I'd likely just marathon right on through...but then of course I'd crave Season Two and where would THAT leave me? Right, a sad little monkey...
A sad little monkey with a paper on 19th century Russia due in 3 days..so alas tomorrow will likely be Smallville-less.
Here's what I need...I need to be a television critic so that someone would PAY me to watch television. Of course then I'd likely have to watch a lot of sucky television...and of course I'd have to invent more profound ways of expressing its badness other than 'sucky' (or 'badness' for that matter).
Why can't I have a job where someone pays me to y'know 'Be Me'...isn't that what they pay Paris Hilton for? I mean she has no discernable talent I can see so...
I'd mostly be good at being me. Except for the times I suck at being me. Which, let's be honest is quite a lot of the time. Of course then someone would have to fire me from being me and THAT would be a difficult task I'd assume. Especially if the one firing me for being me...is ME.
I don't know if I could let myself go. (looks in the mirror...oh yeah I already did)
But I mean in the firing me from being me sense.
Here's how this would go:
Me: Um, listen...this just isn't working out.
Other Me: What do you mean?
Me: Well, you're a nice person and it's been a joy to have you here but we've gotten some complaints, and frankly I think it's best at this time to move in another direction.
Other Me: 'Another direction'?!? Wait...are you FIRING ME?
Me: Look...it's ju..
Other Me: No! You can't just FIRE me...I mean...it's ME!! I...I...
Me: Listen, it's not YOU per se. Sometimes it's just how things happen. If it makes you feel any better it's really...it's..it's me, okay? The problem is me.
Other Me: It can't be YOU...you're ME!! How can YOU have a problem with ME...You're ME!!!!!
Me: I think we've really reached an impasse here and I don't want to have to call security to escort me, I mean you, out of the building...think how that would look. Other Me: Is this a joke? Am I being 'Punk'd'??
Me: No no, I'm being serious here. You need to leave now, I've got to get back to work.
Other Me: You can't 'get back to work', you just fired us.
Me: *taps desk impatiently*
Other Me: Well??
Me: *presses intercom* Mildred will you come in please?
Other Me: Who are you calling?
Me: Nevermind who I...
Other Me: Who is Mildred? You don't have a secretary. If fact you don't even have an intercom, you just pressed your desk with your finger...
Me: I'm calling the cops.
Other Me: Go ahead, I dare ya.
Me: Seriously I'm picking up the phone...
Other Me: No you're just making a phone gesture with your thumb and your pinky...
Me: (silence)
Other Me: sooooooo...
Me: Get back to work.
aaaaaaand Scene

Clearly I need help. As Homer J would say, "I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there...Save me Superman!!!"

I Must Have Left It Outside With My Etiquette

Gracie took another go at my harp yesterday...we played some Black Crowes "Hotel Illness" and she watched for a few minutes before demanding the harp herself. Then when she couldn't figure it out she shoved it back at me. She gets frustrated when she doesn't understand how to make something work (very much like her mommy who can do pretty much EVERYTHING, so the few things she doesn't quite get burns at her soul). I'm just about ready to tackle the Russian paper (due Tuesday...yipes). I'm not procrastinating actually, it's that the material is really difficult and I'm ready it through several times- they are short pieces so that's a good thing. The first is an excerpt from Peter Chaadev's "Apology of a Madman" and the second is Vissarion Bellinski's critique of Gogol's work on Russian society (actually what amounts to an open letter to Gogol chastizing him for being a turncoat intellectual). So as you can probably guess..rather dense material to cut through. We're going to take a break now though and spend some family time (which is Shelley's code for 'going shopping'). She calls it 'family time' so I'm shamed out of being miserable having to go shopping- I hate shopping...with extra hate on top. I have 10 pounds of hate in a 5 pound hate bag for shopping. We have to get another carseat for the new van (which I have to take pictures of I realize), but I'm also hoping that at least we can go to Best Buy and I can drool over cameras and DVDs... Some special notes: Ange- hang in there dearie...we're always thinking of you. Patrick- are you home yet? give a brother a shout out so I know you're safe and sound. Kim- Calgary playing Toronto tonight...it's the game I hate because I love the Flames a tad more than the Leafs...hold me... Nicole- We have to meet up Monday...I'm coming into town to drop off my paper..I want to see your nose (no one gets that but me and you so it's kinda funny no?)

You Don't Need A Weather Man To Know Which Way the Winds Blows

crawling on yer belly
Originally uploaded by AmericaninCanada ...but perhaps it would let you know there's a buinch of about to be dumped in your lap.

It seemed every 5 minutes the glance out my window brought light, then heavy flurries, followed by brief bouts of sunshine. So we stayed inside mostly and watch the madness unfold out the window.

How we are no different that what the west is forced to do with regard to North Korea. So at loggerheads because its position threatens China and Japan (and they've never had the best relationship) not to mention the entire Security Council some of who are fighting a war in Iraq and Afghanistan, some others against that but who are pressing for stronger measures on Iran, and then still others whose agenda vis-a-vis is a freakshow of its own proportion.

Frankly what can we really do? China won't march on Korea, neither will the South. The US couldn't do it without China and South Korea completely on board and no one knows what if anything Kim Jong Il is thinking, and if its anything other than the entire Molly Hatchet oeuvre, well we're just scrwed.

Why is it dictators such as Il demand complete and total feality? Well because living under dictators ain't exactly dancing barefoot in the park (unless the park is really dark and cold, and you're dancing to avoid the gunfired aimed at your feet because you said 'Dear Leader' was looking a little tubby in the 11th picture hanging in your one room apartment. That's if you in the urban centres, the ones that don't get electricity at night.

Life in rural North Korea well now THERE'S a paradise. Your one room apartment is likely an empty stump covered with brush...it's not particularly warm either because since there's little food, these folks tend to eat bark (which really thins the stump down).

Keep A Clean Nose, Watch the Plain Clothes

Now if you're a bark eater then you're at least one step above the other hungry people who we in the west generally only see in horror movies or in Soccer plane crashes in the Andes...You aren't eating bark your eatin Burt, the guy from the neighboring stump.

There's enough blame to go around in this big crazy world. And while it is true sanctions only strengthened Kim Jong Il's grip on his people...he already had them at 'Hello, I'm your Dear Leader, worship me or you'll end up like the Parks next door who don't exist anymore"

Now sure none of that sounds reaaaaally happy, so I decided to leave you with this photo of Gracie being her absolutely silliest in the hopes that through the tense times we can keep our eyes on the things we hold dear most, our family, friends, and future.

We can hope that his system crashes down upon him at some future date. OR that his mafia corrupt government starts an internecine war for power (neither of which sound all that pleasant to rank and file Koreans who'll be caught in the crossfire, nor any of the countries in the world who might be a target in he decides to play pin the ICBM on the Country At Random.

At this point, the only real hope I can see if that when he goes to pull the trigger on the launch codes...well...

"The pump don't work cuz the vandals took the handles"

Fire Bad, Tree Pretty

[x-posted to LJ]
Crowsfoot 2
Originally uploaded by AmericaninCanada. I walked out of class this evening into the chilly Toronto October night and stood in front of Sid Smith scanning the street for my wife who was supposed to be picking me up after class.
As the *tap tap tap* of my toes on the sidewalk began, half out of frustration for having to wait, and half trying to keep the circulation going and keep warm...I waited...

*honk honk*

It was my SIL "I'm your taxi" she calls out.

Hmmm...this can't be good. "Did the car break down" I wondered aloud to myself.

Once inside the van she lays the whole story out for me.

Shell and Ginny Grace were at the mall and Gracie wiggled herself out of her stroller and "plop" head first on the concrete floor.
They were at the emergency room...no blood but lots of tears and fears and the telehealth people said to take her in for to check her over.

So I get to the hospital and find the girls, they are just getting paperwork filled out (oh and I had GG health card...nice...but since I'm the one that is her primary caregiver that's just the way it is)...anyway

They have a separate ER for pediatrics so we go in and wait. They triage and take her vitals. We have to strip her down naked and they weigh her...which she HATES and starts screaming again in her sad pathetic wail, the kind that tears me up inside like nothing in the world...

We get her dressed again and she's so upset she wants both Shell and I to hold her simultaneously which, not being conjoined, is quite difficult. We go back and wait some more. We give her some cheerios even though we're not supposed to feed her but she's starving at this point...she's had no supper, no nap and now its getting close to her bedtime...waaaaaaaay past dinner time and she's just miserable.

I'm upset, Shell's upset, we're upset at each other...it's just a bad bad night.

Even worse for me I've got a paper due tomorrow and there's no way I'm doing it tonight. I've asked for an extension and who knows if he'll grant it and if he doesn't I might just drop the class because I can't deal with not getting a couple extra days for something like this...but that's beside the point

We're home now. They didn't do an X-Ray because she was looking fine to the ER Doc and even though he squeezed her head like he was picking out a ripe melon she didn't seem too fazed. We have to wake her every 2 hours to check on her and as I'm the insomnia boy I get the first shifts, which is in about 20 minutes actually.

So yeah...there you go. I'm tired, cranky, stressed, and a tad bit farmisht (oo check out the gentile breakin out the Yiddish)

What does it all mean? Well as Buffy would say...

Fire bad, tree pretty.

The Adventures of Socks the Monkey in the Great Pumpkin Patch

Shell has been sweing furiously the last few evenings making Ginny Grace a new monkey friend...this makes the 4th monkey (if you don't count to two very small monkeys in Noah's Ark and the really tiny Curious George which would make it 7 monkeys) that Gracie has. Socks is really cute and I think the crochet orange and red flowered hat is the Shell touch... Gracie has loved it all day since Shell gave it to her this morning after breakfast. She even took it with her to our trip to the Andrews Scenic Acres farm which you can see tons of other pictures at Farm Trip Photos These are a few of my favorites

The Blues Before and After

[great song by The Smithereens by the way...] Heading into a long weekend, of the holiday variety that is, is really welcome. This week has been a struggle and I'm just glad it's over. Shell came home tonight and I just had to get out for 15 minutes...just to get out. I drove out, blasted some Foo Fighters on my stereo in the car, got a burger and fries, and stared at the moon for a bit. Thankfully Shell was completely understanding about it. She was going through Gracie's room tonight putting away heaps of clothes that are now too small or too summery since its starting the inevitable slide to Canadian winter. Gracie was being fussy and I was in my office sitting at my desk trying to read some Australia stuff for my paper that is due Wednesday. GG crawled in the room and over to me and tapped me on my knee, which is her way of saying 'up Dada'. She climbed in my lap and pointed at the computer, which could mean that she wanted to look at pictures or listen to some music...so we did both. I popped open the iTunes window and put my Flickr on slideshow and we rocked out to some Dylan, Steely Dan, Jackson 5...then we hit Aerosmith's "Amazing" which is in my harmonica key (C) and since I finally found my missing harp and it happened to be in my desk drawer I pulled it out and played. She enjoys it now, unlike when she was 6 months old and screamed a blue streak at me. Near the solo part I happened to notice we were no longer alone, Shell was spying us from the doorway. I still get stagefright, even in front of her, and I don't play all too often and am woefully underskilled and out of practice...and let's be frank...waaaaay to sober. But I finished anyway. Then Gracie sat there and tried to figure out how it worked, then she put the harmonica in her mouth. When nothing happened she held it out for me and I blew into it....this went on for 10 minutes before she finally moved on to something else...but it was fun while it lasted. I need a new harp though...this old girl is starting to lose her edge. Some of the bent notes sound dead...to much old spit. I used to have 3 when I played more...now I'm left with just this one. Maybe I'll find some cash and get a few new keys, try to recapture some of the magic...hell as long as I can make my wife and daughter smile when I play that's good enough for me.

Bola del juego?!?

From the 'only in Canada' file This came in my email today. There's an indoor winter softball league here and I was interested in playing (since I don't play hockey), and they also have THIS... Slo-Pitch Cuba is in its 6th season and is an All-Inclusive-Vacation package that also includes morning softball games against the resort's hotel workers. It is a great opportunity to learn about the real Cuban culture and lifestyle far away from the tourist trap and on a 1-to-1 basis with members & friends of the down to earth, Cuban ball team. Develop real new friendships and sit either in the Cuban or the Canadian dugout - it is all the same on this trip. The Cubans you play against in the morning will become your friends and often the same people serving you dinner or drinks in the evening. They will be excited you are here to play with them and eager to chat and share with you. These are the people that will truthfully advise on you on how and where to spend your money wisely. Although, there is not much to spend on with this all inclusive personally guided trip - Flight, ground transportation, ball, food, drinks, hotel, nightly local shows, watersports - it is all free once you get there! What about Fidel Castro? Dictator, savior, martyr, tyrant, saint, loved or hated. You won't really find the answer in the newspapers, but it is in the hearts of the native people and the truth is yours to unlock. This is what makes this trip different from all the others. You can come as groups or individuals to make up a team. We will stay at the Sol Sirenas resort in Varadero Beach. It is almost a village of it's own with plenty of restaurants for dinning and several swimming pools and many game areas.

Flying Solo

She took her first transroom flight tonight departing the kitchen and arriving in the living room in roughly 20 seconds. There was some turbulence during the initial acceleration, but she nailed the landing and celebrated with Cheerios all around. Apologies for the poor quailty, the videocam is still dead and the digital camera takes sometimes crappy video indoors...

Tell Me Why I Don't Like Wednesdays

Today was a very hard day. We've been EXTREMELY lucky that in her first year Ginny Grace has never really been sick at all. It was so odd after a while that I started to think she was like Bruce Willis in Unbreakable. She had maybe one or two puking incidents when she was under 3 months and she had the sniffles for perhaps a day in February, but other than that pretty perfect. But today our string was broken...oy! The snot...just just...just so wrong. And when I put her down for her nap today she started to cough and when I rushed back in she had puked all over the place. I had to change her, the bed, everything...even her monkey wasn't spared the horror. Then she cried for an hour, so inconsolably that it broke my heart. She did manage to feel a bit better when we went to pick up her Mommy from the train, and she ate her supper and even decided to walk all the way across the living room and back for us...the most steps she's taken without falling. She went to bed fine too so I'm hoping for her the worst is over (and I know I know I know I know how that's soooooooo not really sick like some of you have had to deal with but I'm new at this so a sneeze is DefCon 3 for me at this stage, though I know there's oh so much more gross to come)...anyway... At least we got to see Shell's beautiful smile when she got home...that's natural radiance there people! (okay maybe it's the flash but that's how I sees it and that's that) I'm getting the cold now too though... It's sitting in the back of my throat taunting me. My head is sort of vibrating as if it's one of the layers of the multi-universe (I don't know from string theory but it sounded good in my head when I thought it...course that could just be the vibrating) Anyhoo... Hockey started tonight...our long national nightmare is over...unless you're a Leafs fan like me and then the nightmare is really just beginning.

A Guest Blog Stint

Hey cats and kittens, I did a guest blog stint on a wonderful music blog called Bon Ton. Check it out and show some love, and also get a couple of free (and totally legal) downloads of 3 great tunes from the band I pimped in the entry.